The real “OC”

My wife and I went to dinner with another couple on Friday night. The meal was terrible, and afterwards we went into the restaurant bar for a nightcap before going home and releasing our babysitters back into captivity. It was our first time venturing into what unbeknownst to us, was a popular “cougar” hangout, and it was pretty entertaining to watch older women in inappropriately tight outfits, and unbelievably orange skin sit there and get hit on guys with dyed hair and “snug” pants (I counted at least 7 “manginas”).

Got me thinking… Who was the original cougar?… or “OC”, as I will refer to it from here on. I have a few suggestions, but you can certainly feel free to post your own in the comment field. I’m thinking these women are all AFTP’s but with a much older and sluttier feel.


This first one was mentioned to me by a buddy a couple weeks ago, and I have no idea if she is even still alive… Remember that older whore on Three’s Company who lived in the same building, and was always trying to bang Jack?

Her character’s name was Lana, she had a big old sloppy rack and couldn’t give a fuck less if John Ritter’s character was really gay or not. She just wanted to sip the juice.

In retrospect, she was fucking TERRIBLE looking. But back then she had a “naughty-older-woman-thing” going on that was extreeeeemely exciting to an overweight pre-teen.


The second was Dean Wormer’s wife from Animal House… Who I think was modeled after Ann Bancroft’s character from The Graduate. The way she downed vodka, and then banged Otter is basically the recipe for a textbook Friday night of the modern day cougar.

The third and final was the older blond cop with the big bombs in Police Academy… What a fucking pig. But clearly she fits the category of OC to a tee.

Who did I miss?